so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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