yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
