They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
