Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize
