Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
sex in a hospital.. check
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
