I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
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