"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
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