Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
