we're blogging at a bar
Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Randomize
