Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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