I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Randomize
