no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Randomize
