I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Randomize
