she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Randomize