So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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