He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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