Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Randomize
