i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
