he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
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