Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
