You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
