This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize
