Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Randomize
