dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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