covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
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