Its about making memories worth repressing
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I believe in your delicious
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
