The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
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