i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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