at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
