i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize
