Sponge bath it is.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Sext me about skeletons
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
Randomize
