ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
Randomize
