god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Randomize