I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
