I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
Operation Purity has been aborted
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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