: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
