I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
Randomize