And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
he puts the penis in happiness.
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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