sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Randomize
