Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
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