I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize