I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
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