I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
