i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
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