well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
