Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
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