Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
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