Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize
