he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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