the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
Randomize