Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize
