i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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